2002-06-26, 4:21 p.m.
i broke down at my therapist. its funny. whenever i dont want to be there the most is when i always end up breaking down and blubbering about how nothings changing. after a long silence because i was crying, i asked "what the hell is wrong with me" he then started to talk about me as if he was reading straight from my file. he said i was "addictive" because im fooling around with things like builimia.
he was really nice today though. he said he cared about me. and i said "big deal. its your job" and he said "no, i didnt have to care." and i said "Why do you care?" and he said "because i like you. i see a future for you. you have tons of potential" it sounds like nothing, but he doesn't hand out compliments unless he really means it.
i see him next week again. so much for seeing him every 2 weeks. hah.
im so full. im stuffing my face with toast and jam. i dotn know why i love toast and jam so much. then im downing a bowl of icecream. i dont feel like i could eat one more bite, but i have to. this is going to be a nice long purge.