damn arms
2002-06-26, 10:47 a.m.

went to magic mountain yesterday. it was hot as hell so i was forced to be in a tank top and shorts with my fat self. i don't even want to think of the calories i consumed. i felt so dizzy and shakey from the heat i had to eat something and of course all they had was shit there to eat. i had some fries and later found a fruit stand and got an orange. i'm still at 100. Not moving. argh.

damn tanktop. i was afraid of people asking about my arms the whole ride up. We got there and I was waiting to go in with the rest of my church when someone gasped in total suprise and utter disgust and asked what happened to my arms. I quickly said "long story." and got away as quickly as my tired legs could take me. later, when standing in line for a ride, i raised my hands to smooth my hair and some other people not in the group of people i was hanging out with but that went to my church saw my arms. This guy, Brian, asked what happened and again I said "long story." he asked to see and I shook my head and turned away. Someone else hanging out with Brian, a girl named Carley, asked me to put my arms out and put hers out side by side with her forearms showing to show what she wanted me to do. I just shook my head again and Brian kept asking to see my arms and I kept despeartly trying to change the subject in fear the people I was hanging out with that day would hear.

meh, I bet the whole world knows about me now.

today i see my therapist. meh. i dont feel like talking or thinking or anything.