2005-06-07, 10:56 p.m.
Quick update because I am going to go to sleep and because this isn't my computer.
Last night after I left the family I was staying with, I tried to go back home. I just couldn't. My mom was screaming at me, and screaming at my dad ABOUT me in the first hour I was home.
I showered and packed and drove off. I slept in my car in a parking lot. This morning I went to a gas station, 6 A.M., and changed my clothes, brushed my teeth, washed face, ect. Then I went to the library. it was closed, so I walked around for about an hour. I sat and watched the ducks in the pond and felt sad.
I called my sister. After long shit with my dad, talking with the both of them, I'm moving in here. My sister is nice, supportive, understanding, and wants the best for me but I am just so scared. I don't want to mess up anymore. I have no strength or energy to keep perservering.
I'm worried about my sister observing my eating habits, I'm worried about money, I'm worried about a zillion things. Right now I'm going to make my bed on the couch because I'm exhausted.